Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Daughter Link

Today I bought a journal to begin to write down all the words of knowledge, experience, wisdom and insight for my daughter that I want to be certain to pass on for her maturing and adult years. No one should ever lose a parent, I know from all the time I've spent with my oldest homeschooling him through highschool, all our talks, all my lectures, all our tears, as a young adult I still have not said all that I would like to say nor am I certain he heard all I DID say in the tone and nature of how I meant it. Even deliberating over every word for my daughter, I know in my heart I won't cover everything. There will still be clueless questions and empty silences.

While searching for a journal, I pondered the idea that every parent should do this for their children, daughters and sons, even when they expect to share a very long and fulfilling life together. Getting down in words the love, the desires, the dreams, the experiences and understanding is so important. Life gets too busy and things are left unsaid or half said. It took me decades to glean the knowledge of the world and my God that I do have, as meager as that may be. I'd like my children to benefit from what I have learned, have freedom to learn their own lessons, and dream their own dreams, and be enveloped in the love of a Sovereign God.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Holding Steady

There hasn't been much to report lately other than increasing discomfort and signs of growing cancer up until this Tuesday when I finally received a chemo treatment. After discussing several drug options with my doc, he opted to stay the course with the carbo treatments I had been receiving before being ill. I felt immediate improvement that day with irritating symptoms. The faith part is hoping that this low dose maintenance treatment will also reduce the CA125 counts that had begun to rise.

The grass is greening but the tics are out. The hyacynths are in bloom but I have a sneaking suspicion the chippies stole many of my bulbs this winter.  Also need some bright perky pansies. Will pick them up this week. All in all we are holding steady, waiting for spring to pop in full bloom and the next bloodwork results.