Emerging

My young son's class planted emporer tulips last fall with the Journey North migration program on the internet. They have a plot outside their school and a plot on the internet map where they can observe the budding and blooming of tulips all up the east coast. I had the opportunity to witness their excitement a week ago as they went checked their garden plot for 'emerging' tulips. This was the new word for the day: emerging. We counted 28 tulips leaves pushing through the soil. What excitement. I drove home to quickly scan my own garden and found not a single tulip leaf twisting in the soil. Now THIS week, I am happy to say we are 'emerging' also. We counted one tulip, one greening primrose and a small clump of narscissus or daffodils and what may be one hyacynth pushing up in the garden. My excitement almost eclipsed that of the kindergarten class. Further announcement of spring will come when the garden is in full bloom.

On the health side of life, my red blood counts are 'emerging' into a much healthier glow, but my white blood count is still struggling. Waiting until April 1 for my next scheduled appointment will mean a six week break since my last treatment. Since this appears to be a result of having received so much chemo compounded by the flu, I don't know when I will be able to tolerate treatment again, if the milder maintenance treatment will be sufficient or if a more toxic dose will be required to reduce tumor growth and if I will be able to withstand a full dose of chemotherapy again. Not much of a note to end on, but that is where I find myself at the time being.

Those Numbers Again

This is the second week my chemo has been cancelled because my counts are not recovering from when I had the flu. I have had so much chemo in the past two years that the bone marrow isn't rebuilding fast enough. I am feeling good at this point, but know that a continued absence of chemo therapy will allow that ever critical CA125 to rise again which will mean much more toxic chemo to shrink the tumors once again. It is now a catch 22 it seems. If my blood counts recover in this next week, I'll still have a chance of getting back on schedule, otherwise we'll be looking for other options.

Community

One thing I realized while in the hospital last month is the need for community and fellowship for my children. When I am absent, the flow of reassuring love enveloping them in a community of faith is so much appreciated. I encourage all our friends to not feel shy about visiting or being a part of our daily life. The safer the children feel in others' companionship the more likely they will receive comfort and assurance when the times are scary. We all need hugs both to give and receive.

Retail Therapy

After a month of illness in our household, my doc says my lungs are recovering well. I had been hospitalized for three days the last week of February due to pneumonia and flu. It was a scare for everyone as my white blood counts fell to 1.2 and platelets fell as well. They had not recovered quick enough to have my scheduled chemo this week. The CA125, though, held steady. So we plan on next week for chemo.

Meanwhile, I took daughter along this time to meet my doc and visit the infusion clinic. He's a cool guy and the nurses are great. Having a picture in her mind of place and people involved may help her deal with my regular trips to Hershey which generally cause her considerable emotional angst. Afterwards we went shopping for spring clothes and treated to a nice meal in a restaurant. She enjoyed girls day out.

So another week of recuperation when I hope to catch up on the house and get some other tasks accomplished. Thanks so much for everyone's love and prayers last week. Our family so appreciates everyone's support and concern for each one of us. My first full day in the hospital was like party day with the constant flow of traffic from many friends. Love you all.